Saturday, November 15, 2008

i had two wonderful dreams

and in my dreams, you finally wanted me back. you held me tight. and then i woke up. this happened twice within my two hours of sleep. they seemed so real.
and from last night til my nap right now, altogether, i have had 3 dreams about you.
even when i want to leave you alone, because that is what you want, i can`t get you out of my head. you`re in my heart forever.

i cried my eyes out last night.
i`d never let anyone see my cry so hard until last night.
jayson held me tight. and he told me that he hated seeing me the way i was.
during debut practices, jayson saw.
and he knew. he could always tell.
and all of my friends asked me what was wrong.
because while all of them were happy and drunk, i was sober, but was still the one crying.
the security guard even gave me a towel to wipe my tears with.

i know that my writing isn`t perfect.
but i can`t seem to think right now.
i don`t care if my grammar or anything is incorrect.
i`m just so shaken up.

i`m leaving you alone now.
that was your wish.

erased from my memory
and i`m sure you`re going to forget everything about me.

everything hurts.

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