Friday, March 13, 2009

my boring life

so it's 4:24 in the morning,
and im beginning to realize that i'm pretty much a ghost to everyone but Justine.
i guess it's sort of what i wanted, but i didnt want them to stop caring.
not one of them has asked me how im doing, but its okay.
cause im feeling the same way ive been feeling for months now.
i guess i havent been making a big effort to talk to people
cause i'm actually trying in school now, for my last two weeks.
not going back to walnut/west covina because i have so much work to do.
but i miss my friends.
i suppose i can sacrifice one weekend for school.
im a horrid student.
and probably a horrid friend.
not like it mattered though, right ?
i think i feel alone more now than ever,
aside from having my best friend justine around, i kinda have no one.
i really miss the way i used to be.
i actually used to be a "happy go lucky" kinda girl.
then i lost someone who meant the world to me,
and as lame as it sounds, my whole world started to crumble.
although i really should have just moved on,
just like i did with all the other guys,
i couldnt seem to let go.
and i know i shouldnt, but i wonder how youre doing.
hopefully, after another week, my break will make everything better again.
i've kinda noticed that if you met me a year ago, you would have liked me better.
you probably wouldnt find me interesting anymore, 
cause im not as bold in person as i was or as i am on my blog.

i knocked out immediately after coming home on my dad's bed.
(sorry dad !)
i just woke up, and my tummy hurts.
i've been feeling sick, no good.
i can just ignore it and fall asleep again.
night, world.

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